Solitoons

The loneliest Toonstack

Solitude: does it thrill you? Does it fill you with longing? Dread? My research—which was extensive* and peer-reviewed**—indicates that feelings about being alone are as incredibly varied and deeply held. . . but I don’t care about other people and their feelings. That’s why solitude, for me, is so excellent.

Cartoonists, I need not tell you by now, are odd ducks. We start out normal humans—bankers, every one of us—but eventually, after spending lots of time alone at our drawing desks, we turn into ducks, and weird ones at that. Ducks whose only possible use to society is drawing little pictures by dipping our wings into ink pots and flapping dexterously. Solitude, you see, is transformative, and necessary: without it, there would be no ducks, only bankers.

Anyway: below, I asked a bunch of ducks to flap dexterously on solitude, and here’s what they came up with.

-Sofia

*scraped from the bottom of my barrel of opinions

**whispered to the lady walking ahead of me on the sidewalk, who didn’t seem to object

PS: If I were better societally integrated, maybe I would have remembered to make this Toonstack about mothers, since today is Mother’s Day. . . but, as previously stated, I am a wild beast. I do, however, have a mother, and I love her!

Hilary Campbell

Dogs. What do they do when they’re alone? What sort of wild lives do they live when their owner seemingly disappears off the face of the earth and time completely disappears. Was it an hour? Was it 2 minutes? I worried about this a lot when I brought my dog Margie home, but turns out when Margie is alone she literally does nothing. She doesn’t even dare move. She just sits and waits until I’m back (sorry to brag, I do have the perfect dog). But does she enjoy it? Hard to say. Perhaps it’s a relief to get a break in after having the serious job of following me around the apartment. She’s probably excited to finally get an uninterrupted nap! Just like Margie, I too love to be alone. But that’s actually new for me in life. Previously, me being alone in a room would easily lead to a panic attack. I recently wrote about this in my own substack! You can check it out here!

Ellis Rosen

Solitude. I haven't heard that name in a long time. 
*I take a long drag from a cigarette. I cough for five minutes* 
Sure, I used to know solitude. Used to see her every day. These days? Not so much.
*Dramatic pause. One more cough.*
Do I miss her? Sure, who wouldn't? Day spent alone, nowhere to be, no one to see, no expectations or responsibilities. But these days I-
*cough*
These days I have a family. Two small Kids. One small apartment. I may not have solitude anymore but I’m living! Really living. No wasted time, no-
*Uncontrollable coughing and wheezing. Finally it ends.*
What was I talking about? Oh that’s right. Solitude. 
I haven't heard that name in a long time.     

Jeremy Nguyen

Even though I spend most of my day working alone, I still find myself needing solitude and time for just me. I really like to keep a work/life balance. When my work schedule is over, I stand up, take off my work pajamas and throw on my lounge pajamas. Then I flip my woven throw blanket over from the gray side to the colorful side. Then I’ll move from one side of the couch to the other side of the couch. Of course, there are days where I work too much, and don’t get that time to decompress. I’ve felt burnt out after watching Netflix in the background of drawing, when really I should be relaxing with HBOMax in the background of snacking. My advice to anyone feeling overworked and needing time to themselves: quit your job, break it off with your lover, leave your family, abandon your home and you’ll have time for all the creeping thoughts in your head. Or just set a timer on your phone.

Johnny DiNapoli

I don’t have a pair of talking pants (...or do I?) (I don’t), but I do talk to myself a lot when I’m alone. I also sing to myself, either songs stuck in my head or musically narrating whatever I’m doing. Fine little ditties like “cooking linguine, and I’m low on black pep-per!” and “looking for my book, who moved my book maybe a ghoooooost”.  I’m a real hoot (...or am I?) (I am!)

Karen Sneider

Here’s my problem with solitude: I hate it. I’m a people person! Plus, I wouldn’t get anything done. It's hard for me to concentrate when I’m totally alone, I need a little distraction. Many people think solitude is the ideal state for accomplishing things, but not me. Personally, I would like to set up a desk in the middle of a busy fairgrounds, continually interrupted by screaming crowds, bellowing livestock and clowns. Only then will I truly be successful. 

Navied Mahdavian

I’ve often wondered what it would be like to be an introverted penguin. 

I’d watch that movie.

Jason Katzenstein

This cartoon was licensed for a textbook called “Abnormal Psychology.” But the hydrant just wants to hang! What could be more normal?

I often begin brainstorming ideas with, “What would this inanimate object be thinking?” In fact, I’m just transposing my own thoughts onto inanimate objects. It is I who has the abnormal psychology. 

Jared Nangle

I like being alone… until I don’t like being alone. Then I feel real lonely. Sometimes I sit and drink wine and listen to “In My Room” by the Beach Boys and look in the mirror and say, “I CHOSE THIS." Only a matter of time before I install another mirror so my alone self and my lonely self can keep each other company. 

Mads Horwath

You remember that story we were told about the moths? The dark grey ones were eaten while the whites ones thrived and then, due to all the pollution during the Industrial Revolution, the dark grey ones thrived while the white ones were eaten by predators? Maybe it was the other way around. I think about this with being a loner nerd my entire life. I learned to enjoy my own company and then when Covid hit, I thrived fairly well while the socially adept ones with friends really struggled.

Sofia Warren

There’s nothing I love more than being a part of strangers’ private moments. How do I do it? I eavesdrop, and I look in peoples’ windows. I don’t mean you any harm! I just like knowing that Ms. Hot Dog irons her buns every night, and that you’re still mad at your boyfriend for that thing he said four years ago. You might be thinking, “but that’s private! That’s why I said that privately,” but I assure you, I am a gentle, respectful voyeur/entendeur, and I’m really a better judge of whether or not I should be a part of your life than you are. And, if that doesn’t convince you, need I remind you that I’m just a duck?

Also: this hot dog lady is inspired by my friend Ivy Haldeman’s incredible painting series.

ATTENTION: EVENT!

Sign up here!

Toonstack News and Extras

• Amy Kurzweil teaches cartoon classes on Patreon! Sign up now to get the recording of every past class, and join the next live class!

• Listen to Hilary’s brand new podcast What’d You Do This Weekend?

• Pre-order Sofia Warren’s book, Radical!

• Order Send Help! a desert island cartoon collection by Ellis Rosen and Jon Adams, out now!

• Have you checked out cartoonstock.com? Thanks to New Yorker cartoon editor emeritus, Bob Mankoff, this is the place to license and buy prints and merch of the best cartoons in the world, from The New Yorker, Wired, Airmail and...ToonStack! 

• Be sure to check out Shelby Lorman’s newsletter, Please Clap!

• The same goes for Sofia Warren’s advice newsletter, You’re Doing Great!

• See more cartoons from Ellis Rosen’s weekly Junk Drawer!

• Jeremy’s book “Can I Pet Your Dog” is available for pre-order!