A Fat Stack of Holiday Cheer
Ah, "the holidays." Do you feel pulled between your perfect memories of years past and the fact that sometime recently you wanted to scream/sob/deck a family member? Totally normal. Is it hard that holidays are full of personal/spiritual/cultural meaning and also an insane spending fest of money/time/energy? Yeah, it's hard. Do we need these holidays of light and community to pass through these times of dark by which I mean less sunlight and also [insert 1-7 specific existential dreads]? Probably. Raise a glass. If you're reading this, you're alive and in the soup of it so have another round of eggnog, eat something sugary, and enjoy the show.
This is the first ever cartoon I sold to the New Yorker and while it wasn’t about the holidays when I drew it, looking at it now I think it’s quite accurate. We’re wrapping up all our feelings into packages to give to each other! Christmas is beautiful but it’s sad. There’s so much expectation built in, so many memories, and love lost and gained every year. Whenever people talk about the song “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas” as if it’s some cheery jingle, I’m like… have you listed to the lyrics? It’s horribly depressing. And don’t get me wrong—It’s also MY favorite Christmas song but I’m not sure the rest of the world is clued in. Or maybe they just haven’t actually seen Meet Me in St. Louis? The song is sung right when the family believes their life is never going to be the same and the youngest daughter is literally sobbing. The original lyrics to the song started out like this… ‘Have yourself a merry little Christmas // It may be your last // Next year we may all be living in the past.’ But Judy Garland and the studio were like, can you lighten it up a smidge? The final song is slightly happier but the melancholy is still very present.
So do you see what I’m saying!!?? Is this a depressing rant?? My bad, but this is what the holidays do to me. Deal with it!
Whether you know them as the biblical Magi, the Three Wise Men, Three Kings, or the Three Wise Guys, you never hear about the fourth guy. Comedy has a rule of threes-- that's why Jerry got cut from the team, see? Nobody ever talks about Jerry. For that, we are all the poorer. Merry Holidays.
As a non-Christmas celebrator, I can have fun with my own little myths about what you all are doing tonight and tomorrow. First, I imagine you do shots of eggnog and frankincense to get yourself good and sloshed. Then, you roast a giant pine tree in the fireplace – that's what those big oven mitts hanging on the mantel are for. Then, you lasso several deer from your lavish backyard estate in order to play deer polo with the sparkling balls you removed from your pine tree dinner – the winner gets to climb the chimney, where magic elves are waiting to grant you one wish. Inevitably, you wish to become God, which is why early the next morning, you emerge from the chimney as a white man with a flowing white beard and a list of everyone's true moral status and their deepest wishes. Children lavish you with cookies. You reward the benevolent and punish the wicked. You wake up in your own bed with no memory of any of this. Merry Christmas!!!
This song makes me think about the pressure to be Super Happy during the holidays, so then I like to remember all the chaos that ensues when we mix family, alcohol, and high expectations. Let's keep it light, people!
I recently watched "It's a Wonderful Life" for the first time. And I cried, I'll admit it. When George and the evil townsfolk foil poor ol' Mr. Potter plans to turn Bedford Falls into a free market paradise, I shed a tear, alright. I'm no monster.
Next up is the Christmas classic: Die Hard. #TeamGruber
I love me a good pagan ritual coated in a thin veneer of western tradition. Lemme grab something from outside and force it to be part of my narrative. Gimme a pumpkin and let me carve a face in it. Pass me an egg so I can paint on designs. Lemme chop down a tree and make it dress up fancy to entertain me for weeks. Better yet, give me 20 trees. They smell so nice.
BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!
Want to learn to toon? Take Sofia's Beginner's Comics course (six weeks by Zoom, starting 1/16)
Amy Kurzweil’s graphic memoir, Artificial: A Love Story, was named a best book of 2023 by The New Yorker, NPR and Kirkus, and it would make a great holiday gift!
Want to draw people? Kendra's online class "Figure Drawing for People Watchers" runs this February.
Cartoons by Hilary comes out every Friday!
Navied Mahdavian’s graphic memoir, This Country: Searching for Home in (Very) Rural America is out, and it’s getting rave reviews!
Ellis Rosen’s DINK! is the perfect gift for the pickleball enthusiast in your life!
Check out Jason Katzenstein’s Patreon
Amy Kurzweil teaches cartoon classes on Patreon! Sign up now to get the recording of every past class!
Jason Chatfield’s weekly newsletter New York Cartoons is a riot!!!